10+ Italian Foods That Don’t Exist – Funny Edition

I know this post about Italian foods that don’t exist in Italy will cause a bit of a scuffle around here. But hear me out before we end up in it: some recipes which claim to be Italian and traditional are everything but. And this comes from someone who loves fusion cooking, mixing tradition with new ideas and also mixing cuisines.

What I really mean by Italian foods that don’t exist in Italy is a whole selection of recipes most of us have learnt to assume are traditional. But they are most definitely not. And dare I say, kind of offensive to an Italian person who’s very much into their tradition and especially their food! Because you can say anything about someone’s life here in Italy, but do not touch our food. Never.

Yes, sometimes some people do get very precious about stuff, and Italians seem to do that a lot with food. The same can be said about their football too, I am assuming, but you’ll soon find out I am not into that at all. So here we dive into some of these Italian foods that don’t exist in Italy and find some alternatives on what to order next time you are travelling in the bel paese. Maybe even because of one – or more! – of these 17 reasons you should visit.

10+ Italian Foods That Don’t Exist In Italy

I have to start by saying that, in no way, we are trying to offend any of these dishes. You’ll soon find out we have tried most of these already – remember what I said? We’re not as precious about our food combos as most Italians are. And we probably enjoy some of these every so often. Yes, we do still hold our Italian passports in our pockets, in case you were wondering. And you’ll soon understand what I mean, so do not fret – and just keep reading.

1. Chicken on Pizza or Pasta

Call it a pet peeve of mine, or maybe not. But I dare you to find an authentic Italian dish like pasta or pizza with chunks of chicken on it. Don’t get me wrong, we love chicken. Especially in this household, we love love chicken. But everything has a place in this world, and chicken does not belong in pasta or pizza. Ever. And you will find out, I strongly feel about this, so yeah.

Order this instead: Why not try the myriad of dishes we have without chicken on? We love a good pizza with salami on it (not pepperoni!), especially if nice and spicy. And when it comes to pasta, well, there is so much available out there, I’d recommend some nice spaghetti aglio, olio e pepperoncini, ciriole, pasta alla cenere or even a fancier cacio and pepe.

2. Pineapple & Ham Pizza

Admittedly, this one I have tried time and time again, and personally I do not mind it. But mention it to any Italian and they are bound to be riled up for the rest of their lives. There is no way you can fight your way out of this: pineapple does not belong on pizza for 89% of Italians around the world. Then you get 10% of Italians who have tried it, and enjoyed it, but will never admit to it because it can be considered treason. And that 1%, well…

Order this instead: Any other pizza will work! Honestly, do not risk being kicked out of a fine establishment over the fun and giggles you might have by ordering the pizza most Italians disdain.

3. Lasagna – Italian foods that don’t exist in Italy

So this one it’s very much a controversy when it comes to the Italian foods that don’t exist. Mostly because every region, city and household will have their own favourite version. But the original, traditional lasagna is layers of pasta, ragù and bechamel sauce. Sprinkles of Parmesan cheese on top are optional, but you get the gist.

The southern way does include ricotta, boiled eggs – you name it, they might have put it in there. But the traditional is definitely the one we all love. One more for the Italian foods that don’t exist.

Order this instead: try the traditional lasagne, but also do try the different versions available, because each one is most definitely delicious!

4. Creamy Carbonara Spaghetti

I have to be 100% on this because there is no cream in carbonara, ever. And that creaminess is achieved with the egg and the pasta’s cooking water, not cream. Yes, there it goes and I said it. Carbonara and cream do not go together, ever. This is the one dish I really cannot stand when made improperly.

Order this instead: Cacio e pepe is the vegetarian version of this dish, and it’s pretty much *chef’s kiss*. But amatriciana it’s also a good option if you feel like you need to have tomato sauce when eating pasta.

5. Garlic Bread

Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE garlic bread. But I did not know of garlic bread until I moved to the UK 12 years ago. Garlic bread the way we know it it’s not the Italian version of it. The garlic & herb butter-smothered baguette it’s not it. We do, however, make a simpler version of bruschetta where the toasted slice of good bread is rubbed with a fresh garlic clove as it’s still hot. No tomatoes, no fancy cheese or anything else, just some delicious garlicky goodness that is crunchy and warm. Salivating as I type this, just saying. One from the Italian foods that don’t exist in Italy that I love.

Order this instead: There is really nothing I can think of that is similar to this that you’d be able to order, sadly. Try it at home is your best bet, and 100% worth it. Order gnocco fritto instead if you are in Emilia Romagna.

6. Spaghetti Bolognese – Italian foods that don’t exist.

Now, this one is a bit of (another) controversy when it comes to this dish. Of course, you can indeed have bolognese sauce on spaghetti, but that is not really traditional. Italians would generally eat ragù alla bolognese with fettuccine or tagliatelle, rather than spaghetti. But the issue here is not what you eat it with, it’s the name it gets identified as. Ragù alla bolognese is also a good base for lasagna and tortellini (which also originate from Bologna!).

Order this instead: Fettuccine or tagliatelle alla bolognese, but even polenta is a great option to order if you are closer to the north of Italy.

7. Caesar Salad

In my 32 years of life, I had never made the connection between Caesar and this salad. Talk about the Italian foods that don’t exist in Italy. Fun days! But also, it has nothing to do with Julius Caesar himself! Fun fact, this salad was invented by an Italian chap named Caesar living in Tijuana, Mexico. So probably nothing of it would make sense to an Italian person, but you will very likely find it served at most restaurants nowadays.

Order this instead: A nice Caprese with fresh mozzarella and tomatoes and some good olive oil goes a long way in my opinion! Also a super traditional Italian dish you must try at least once.

8. Pepperoni Pizza

Most of the Italian foods that don’t exist in Italy are usually a question of semantics. And this is possibly the best example. Pepperoni with a double P? Does not exist. Peperoni, on the other hand, it’s peppers. Which, we happily put on pizza. But pepperoni? We don’t really call it that, around here. I feel like you can say we do add a spicy salami to our pizza, but there is nothing coming close to the pepperoni pizza I had from Prince Street Pizza in New York. So, while it’s one of the Italian foods that don’t exist in Italy, it’s still a brilliant dish in itself.

Order this instead: Spicy salami pizza is a good option, if you want that same taste and crunchiness to your pizza.

9. Fettuccine Alfredo

This one must be my absolute favourite out of all these dishes, because it is honestly just not a thing around here. Or better, not under this name. These fettuccine were born in 1907 in Rome, yes, because Alfredo Di Lelio was preparing a pasta dish for his then-pregnant wife. Fettuccine, butter and parmesan, nothing else. This is the kind of dish I remember eating if I had an upset stomach as a kid, so I never understood the frenzy around it. Thus winning the title of Italian foods that don’t exist in Italy, really. Because Alfredo sauce it’s not a thing.

Order this instead: While these can be a very comforting dish, I would opt for a risotto with butter and parmesan instead, but that is my personal preference really.

10. Chicken Parmigiana – Italian foods that don’t exist

Another one for the giggles, we do not (and I repeat, we do not!) have such a thing as chicken parmesan. We do make parmigiana, but with aubergines. And there are plenty of different ways and styles in which this special – and oh so tasty! – dish is made. But one thing is the common denominator: aubergines. No chicken, no other vegetable or meat: aubergines. And I am quite sure any other Italian will agree with me when I say this is the main star of this list of Italian foods that don’t exist in Italy.

Order this instead: Aubergine parmigiana, end of it.

11. Spaghetti With Meatballs

We all know this is another common recipe you’ll find everywhere, and I am pretty sure we need to blame Disney and their Lily & The Tramp. No, you won’t find two dogs sitting outside the restaurant, eating spaghetti and meatballs. Mostly because we like to have the two separate. So while it does appear in the Italian foods that don’t exist in Italy list, it’s really just a matter of eating them separately. And forget the marinara sauce, it does not belong.

Order this instead: Rather than instead, I would say order all the meatballs you can think of! Italy is pretty known for all the kinds of different meatballs including those made of fish and of vegetables, so plenty for everyone – and all worth a shot!

So what are your thoughts on the Italian foods that don’t exist in Italy?

It was fun to discover some fun facts about those Italian foods that don’t exist in Italy, so I hope you have as much fun reading this as I did writing it! Any of these were a surprise to you at all?

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